Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Guten Rutsch!

I am in the town of Lutherstadt Wittenberg, in Germany. Today is New Year's Eve, known to the Germans as "Silvester." I've been here since Sunday, and have had a great time so far. I must admit, I still feel as though I am on vacation and not actually living here. I suppose it will take some weeks for that reality to sink in.

On Friday I am taking the train an hour north to Berlin, and moving into my new place. This will have the advantages of internet, privacy and not being forced to live out of my backpack.

I can't get used to how the sun only really shines from 9:30 to 4pm, and even then it never gets very high in the sky. It's like living in Alaska or something. Maybe I am too equatorial from living in Florida too long.

Tonight should be fun. Germans are only allowed to purchase and use fireworks and other pyrotechnics on December 30th & 31st. So, naturally they make the most of it. At least that's how it was last year.

I still haven't established a good sleep schedule, though it's only been a few days. I'm guessing it will take a few more days. I keep waking up at 2, 4 & 5am. This will serve me somewhat well when language classes begin next Monday at 9am.

I've been following the Israel/Gaza madness. I wonder if they will ever stop slaughtering each other. So far it's been 4-5 days and almost 400 Palestinians are dead. Probably more based on how many are "missing."

I've been reading some mass-market spy-action-thriller book by a guy named Vince Flynn. It's really entertaining. Like "24," if it were a book. Picked it up for 50% off at the Sarasota airport before I left.

I've got to go grocery shopping before it closes (early, like noon) today and remains closed until Friday.

I will likely be updating this more often now that I am "abroad."

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Change I can believe in

So I am currently sitting on the couch in my mother's home in Sarasota, FL. I arrived here yesterday after days of packing up my apartment in Tallahassee, FL. I will keep this part of the rant short, but basically I feel the act of "moving" to be one of the most strenuous and difficult tasks to do. Partly this is because I am a notorious pack-rat, and had not thrown anything away since my first apartment when I was 19 years in 2001.

I ended up throwing away a great deal of detritus this time. Everything from college notebooks to my 2004 "Employee of the Month" certificate from when I worked at Blockbuster Video. Jesus. What the hell compelled me to keep such a thing? There's more, of course. Letters, notes, papers, pamphlets, movie ticket-stubs, the list goes on and on. Mainly, when all was said and done, I kept my books, my DVDs, some clothes (though I donated 6 garbage bags full of clothing to Goodwill, along with most of my other meaningless possessions [plates, towels, blankets... essentially everything I DIDN'T keep]). I sold all of my video games and systems for $222 cash, which was awesome. I gave away half of my furniture, my television, bookshelves, chairs.

Ridding oneself of most material items is marvelously liberating, to be quite honest.

Besides, I couldn't take it to Germany when I leave here [in FOUR days], and don't want to store it all somewhere. Just isn't worth it.

The hardest thing to do was to give up my cat, Merle. I had him for over six years, after rescuing him from a dumpster near my first apartment in 2002. It was particularly cold that year, and he was very young and thin. I gave him to a couple in Tallahassee who work for an international environmental law firm. When I left their apartment after saying farewell to my feline, I felt like someone had just shot my son in front of my eyes. I know that may sound ridiculous, but I had more trouble saying goodbye to Merle than to any human I've said goodbye to so far. I take comfort in the fact that he isn't dead, and will spend the latter half of his life in a loving home with people who have the means to take care of him. Plus, they promised to send pictures once and a while, which will help.

So, I am going to Germany on Saturday (landing Sunday the 28th) for an indeterminate amount of time. It could be a few months, or a few years (though much more likely to be the latter). I have written about this before, I know. I have been spinning my wheels, lost in a haze of boredom, apathy and loneliness for the past 5 months since I returned from Germany last time. A college graduate who is simply that. A 26-year old with a piece of paper saying that I'm smart enough to finish a four-year degree at a state university. Finally, I am moving abroad. To me this is the ultimate lifestyle change. I feel that this change is one that I need more than anything else since I moved to Tallahassee in 2006. Sure, there are plenty of things for me to be apprehensive about, but at this point I am just looking forward to believing in myself, in life, in my future once more.

For the very few of you who read this: Expect more frequent entries upon departure/arrival.